the tale of two televisions

I'm not sure what I was thinking.

For some time it's been clear that I needed to think about replacing my television -- it is a TV/VCR combo, and the VCR is on the fritz. If it gets much fritzier, then the TV goes with it. A package deal.

So when I saw this new TV at a garage sale this morning, a little light went off in my head.

Let's back up a minute. Now, one option for replacing the TV would be not replacing it. However, as I live alone, the television often serves just as background noise to heighten my sense of security. And, frankly, I like TV. I don't watch tons of it, relatively, but I want to have it around.

This new TV, anyway, was sitting on the ground there. It looked nice, and the price wasn't terrible. It got even better when I offered her something lower and she took it.

The first challenge should have tipped me off right away -- the ladies selling it said it was heavy, so I could back my car up and they'd help me load it. The tip -- if it takes two ladies to get it IN the car, how can one lady get it out? Hm?

Throwing reason to the wind, I went ahead and took it home.

Now, ladies, it has been proven once again that brains beat brawn again and again. I took my desk chair out and scooted the set halfway around the block on it and into my very own living room!

That was when I got the TV onto my table, and realized how monstrous it really was. 27" is a lot of television -- at least three of my old TVs would fit inside of it... And when you sit just four feet from it, the people's heads are bigger than your own.

I feel truly disgusted with it. It's enormous. I simply don't need it. But now I have it, and it will sit there, haunting me with its material superfluity, until one of us dies.