Heaven help me.
Like I wrote before, this job looks like it will be more and less challenging than expected.
The "more" parts just get so overwhelming, you know?
I think the social components of the job will be among the most difficult, i.e. getting along with co-workers. It's not that I don't like them -- they really were friendly. But working here in the "real world" is different than working in Northwest Iowa, where the non-god-fearing person is the exception to the rule. It's just going to be different to remember how to relate to people my age who don't share my values, i.e. my idea of a successful weekend does not correlate to how much alcohol I consumed. I'm sure I already seem boring enough to them, mostly because I didn't have that much to say and I didn't have interesting hobbies and came from the boondocks and actually thought this town might be worth living in. If you're under a certain age you're expected to think it's dumb.
And people here are just more aggressive in general. If you happen to know me, you know that, well, I am not aggressive (in most cases) and I shy away from conflict of any kind. This will be a problem here (the conflict part).
And, my first day was the first day back for the rest of the staff after someone was unexpectedly fired.
Being in an unfamiliar process is also challenging. I like to have my mind wrapped around a system, and here the system is more fluid than I'm used to. I am not in control of the system, and that will be frustrating to get used to.
Mostly today I did nothing. I think they forgot I was there a lot. They were busy. I rewrote some press releases they didn't end up needing and then I read some stuff.
I saw copy errors. I wanted to help them, but they were published weeks ago.
I can feel I'm starting to go into panic mode -- the pre-depression mode, and I know I need to start thinking positively about absolutely everything ASAP. It's so difficult.
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About the alcohol, a lot of people are just talk the next morning. And if you really prod a drunk, they'll tell you they know it's unhealthy and stupid.
Actually, I kind of keep it on the DL, but I learned about burnout and depression in my training to be at my current job, and realized I had been burnt out and depressed at my last job.
Things that help (don't ask why it's just what the lady told me at the seminar). 1) Keep a schedule. Make yourself go to bed at a certain time. Don't get too much sleep (you're subconciously avoiding reality), and of course don't get too little sleep. Balance your time with yourself and with friends. Make an effort to have both. 2) Work out. All your primordial juices need an outlet whether it's running, weight lifting or yoga, you have to do something or you'll go crazy. 3) Spend some time for yourself doing what you want to do, reading, walking, praying whatever. Don't do it with any other distractions.
When I lost my job in SF, my friends encouraged me to work out (because that's what they do), and they're great people, but I seriously think the exercise helped my attitude. Plus it gave me some time to myself, and a chance to make a few friends.
Wow, well that was ment to be encouraging, but if it came out as a lecture, I'm sorry.
We all know you love this job, and I don't think this is going to stop you. :)
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