degree surfing

So... about sixty years to fill.

Step one: Pick up the "Rhetorical Grammar" textbook and see if you can major in rhetorical grammar.

Step two: Google all the schools listed in the acknowledgements in all the rhetoric textbooks in the bookshelf.

Step three: Read every page linked to UI Urbana-Champagne's writing studies program. See the words theory and pedagogy and critical so much that grad school doesn't sound fun anymore.

Step four: Go back to Mizzou's graduate editing homepage and picture yourself with a can of red pens and a bookshelf full of stylebooks (one of which you compiled). Headline snafus are tacked up all over your bulletin board.

Step five: Remember the money-hungry ad monster that makes the newspaper possible.

Step six: Check your e-mail for the 56th time this hour and wonder if anyone wants to pay you $30,000 a year to proofread previously published newspapers, conjugate French verbs and work algebra problems in a tulip field where chocolate mysteriously has no caloric value.